Do you have trouble sticking up for yourself? Do you feel pushed around or walked over? Do you find it difficult to say no to others? Do you do things that you did not want to do? Here are a few things you can practice to make things better.
Sometimes it is tough to let go of a relationship, but you should keep only relationships that are on equal ground and give up the rest. Do you call your friend or go see them, but they never call you? Are you always there for them, but if you ask for help they never do? Are you routinely giving above and beyond at work because they’ve come to expect it? Do you have anyone in your life that simply drains you? If they are not an elderly parent or a child that you care for, then it is the right thing to do to give up unequal relationships and move on. It will help both of you.
This is very important. When someone picks on you, tell them to stop it. Constructive criticism should be just that: helpful and constructive. If the criticism makes you feel bad and it continues, tell them to cut it out or just walk away from them when they are doing it. Some people have a terrible habit of criticizing others and making them feel bad. You should not put up with this kind of treatment because it will tear you down and lets them continue behaving badly. It doesn’t do any good to argue with them. The way to make it stop is to just tell them that’s enough and if they do not stop immediately, walk away. That sends the message that you won’t put up with it and you should do that every time.
Learn to say no. Many people find themselves agreeing to do things they do not wish to do. Saying no gets easier with practice. Start with the easier situations, keep it simple, and just say something like, “No, I can’t today!” It helps to quickly change the subject and keep talking. You do not even have to offer a reason.
Learn to say yes to things you want to bring into your life and stop asking for permission to do things. The only times you should ask for permission are when you are doing so out of courtesy because you are using something of theirs or some similar situation. You are a free person and should treat yourself that way. If you want to go back to college, go to college. If you want to go see a friend, see your friend. Let people know what you are doing out of courtesy, but unless you are sharing money, you do not need permission.
Speaking up, in general, will also help you to feel like you are sticking up for yourself. You can express your opinions and feelings, and you will feel better if you do. Try taking some of these tips seriously and bring a new change in your personal and professional life.